Seven Gifts for Seven Groomsmen

A few ideas for groomsmen gifts, by Wayne R. Glazer

So I'm trying like heck to help out the Mrs.-to-be with planning the big event. She's got me calling this florist, and tasting that cake, and trying on 8 different styles of tuxedos - I always thought there was one tuxedo; you know, like the one 007 wears before he bags the babes... I'm busier than a beer vendor on Irish Pride night at Fenway Park. But there is one detail that my little lady will not be pushing upon me, as I have taken the initiative and have begun searching for the perfect groomsmen's gifts.

What's that old Broadway show called? Seven Brides for Seven Brothers, right? Well, I've got to find seven Gifts for Seven Groomsmen. That's right SEVEN. Why? Because my lovely fiance (and she most definitely is lovely) picked seven bridesmaids. Keep in mind, that is not including the - let me see if I get this right - five junior bridesmaids, four mini-maids and two flower girls. It's like an estrogen parade leading us up to the altar. I'm not going to match up every little lady with a willing participant, so my job was to select seven comrades to stand by my side and provide me with "support and encouragement and little levity" according to the minister. I'm not sure what he meant by "a little levity" but to me it meant bachelor party! I'm sure to him it meant a well-timed joke or the classic "Help Me" stenciled on the bottom of my shoes.

Now groomsmen have a tough job ahead of them - lots of walking, standing, more walking, posing for pictures, etc. So I really want to get them gifts to say "thanks" and something they would use, not just toss in the closet or put up for sale on eBay. But where do I start? And should I get seven of the same groomsmen gift?

They all have a desk of some sort, so maybe personalized file folders with leather tabs and brass rivets. Except that Jimmy doesn't really have a desk - he's a sales rep, always on the road. I thought a nice executive pen might be a good choice; perfect for signing important contracts, doing their holiday cards, or writing me a check for the money they owe me from countless poker nights. Then again, Scotty is anything but an "executive" and he loses his keys or his wallet at least once a week. This nice pen would be gone before I got back from my honeymoon.

I'm always emptying out my pockets around the house when I come home at the end of the day, and Cynthia will always collect my keys, money clip, change, collar stays, toll receipts, etc. and then put it on the dresser in the bedroom. Then she bought me a dresser caddy to put everything in and we leave it on a table by the front door. Good gift? It was perfect for me, and I know these guys would use it. But I also have this vision of Vincent's Black Lab "Max" either chewing it to shreds or drinking water out of it, so I hesitate on that one too. Vincent and Rich did get me started drinking good wine, so I thought something "wine-related" would be nice, like a fancy wine stopper. But again, someone gets left out here, as I know Scotty would never use it. He thinks wine is waste of money and is satisfied with drinking his Michelob Ultra, or whatever the low-carb beer of the month is -- you'll learn one day Scott. Meanwhile, there's just more Dry Creek and Cane for the rest of us.

Everyone has to carry cash with them, so how about an engraved money clip? It's stylish, simple and easy to use - which is good for Carlos, because he can be a bit slow at times. However I know at least two of the guys would never use it - Jimmy and Vincent carry everything in their wallet: pictures, credit cards, ATM cards, video store cards, supermarket store cards, gym id, school id (we've been out of school for over 10 years guys, ditch the id...) dry cleaning receipts, concert ticket stubs, ransom notes, etc. OK, maybe not such a good choice. I do like the idea of personalized gifts though, and Adam was always borrowing my knife when we were roommates years back, so the idea of a stylish pocketknife comes to mind. But then I remembered the day Adam put a four-inch gash in his left thumb with said knife, so I figure I should opt for something a bit safer.

So what was the final groomsmen gift of choice? While it would be easier to get seven of the same thing, I decided to pick the best gift for each guy - Carlos is getting the custom file folders for his desk, I'm giving Adam and Rich the engraved money clip, and for Vincent and Rich I found a cool wine gift set with a corkscrew and bottle stopper I decided on a stylish silver pen for Jimmy, which is perfect since he just got promoted and will be pitching bigger clients and (hopefully) closing bigger deals. And for Scotty? I found him these cool leather can caddies so he can drink whatever beer he wants and no one can tease him about it.